Emotional Strength

When I was in my third year of dental school, my family and I went through some difficult times.  My wife lost her dad to cancer within six months of his diagnosis.  We also had two late miscarriages.  On top of this, I began the clinical practice of dentistry at school.  Besides the heartache of the death of loved ones, we were travelling with our three other children between Arizona and Wyoming multiple times for a last visit with Grandpa Opie and for the funeral since we couldn't afford to buy five round-trip plane tickets each time.

Looking back, it's obvious I could have handled the stress better.  Food became my comfort, I put on extra weight, lost a LOT of sleep, and although I tried to keep a smile on my face at school, I felt myself wearing thin.  Since I had shared news of the first lost pregnancy with classmates, there was a constant reminder of the pain of lost hopes.  I don't recount all of this looking for sympathy, especially because there are plenty of people who have suffered more, but the short version is that both my wife and I were under a lot of emotional stress.  We used up our emotional strength to just survive the negative life events.

Emotional strength is what makes it possible to survive such things.  Wouldn't it be nice if nothing like death or disappointment ever happened to any of us, but these things come to all of us.  And we all know people who seem to handle such pain and stress with grace and strength.  It's their emotional strength!  So where does it come from?  It comes from knowledge of the truth about our own self-worth.  Not self-esteem, that's something else.

Have you ever had the courage to ask yourself "what am I worth?".  The answer isn't about money or the number of friends you have, and definitely not about how many likes you get on your Facebook posts.  Your true worth as a person is priceless, and there is a connection between this worth and your emotional strength.  I may be worth a lot, but if I don't believe it, what is the use?  I believe my worth is great when I do certain things, especially one thing in particular.  The most important thing to do to recognize my self-worth and build emotional strength is to love.  Not faked or selfish "love", but real sharing of myself with others, with all the vulnerability that goes along with it.  The love I express through small kindnesses and effort to give emotional strength to others, even if it isn't very successful, brings emotional strength and a true belief in my self-worth.  That knowledge is what carries us through difficulty.

Remember, you have a lot of worth.  Go share yourself, and your unique influence with others:  you will see what I mean.  Stay tuned for more ways to build your emotional strength.